The churning of anger produces strife.

Proverbs 30:33 (NASB) from the daily reading in the One Year Bible

For the churning of milk produces butter,
And pressing the nose brings forth blood;
So the churning of anger produces strife.

There are many types of strife we can produce as we allow anger to churn. Some of them appear in the list of deeds of the flesh in Galatians 5:19-20.      Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are: immorality, impurity, sensuality, ²⁰ idolatry, sorcery,      enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions,       ²¹ envying, drunkenness, carousing, and things like these, of which I forewarn you, just as I have forewarned you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.

Medical science also says that anger, bitterness, unforgiveness and that sort of strife is unhealthy and contributes to many diseases and infirmities. So there is good reason, both naturally and spiritually, for us to learn to appropriately deal with anger. In Ephesians 4, Paul is giving instruction on how believer should live together, how they should relate to one another. Verses 25-27 say:    Therefore, laying aside falsehood, speak truth each one of you with his neighbor, for we are members of one another. ²⁶ Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, ²⁷ and do not give the devil an opportunity.

There are several things we can take from those verses. First we need to understand that anger itself is not sin, or how could it be said “Be angry, and yet do not sin”?  Jesus Himself showed anger in Matthew 21:12-13, And Jesus entered the temple and drove out all those who were buying and selling in the temple, and overturned the tables of the money changers and the seats of those who were selling doves. ¹³ And He *said to them, “It is written, ‘My house shall be called a house of prayer’; but you are making it a robbers’ den.”   God’s anger is also shown toward sin and unrighteousness.

 Ephesians 4:26-27 says:  Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, ²⁷ and do not give the devil an opportunity. It is the holding on to our anger, the churning of our anger, which causes strife and allows the devil an opportunity. The opportunity the devil takes when we hold onto and allow our anger to churn is to cause, enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions, along with bitterness, resentment and unforgiveness.

The first thing we need to recognize about our anger is what we are angry about. Are we angry at an offense against God’s righteousness and holiness as Jesus was when He drove out the merchants and money changers? Or are we angry about an offense against ourselves? If the offense is against us personally then we need to remember Jesus instruction to the disciples when they asked about forgiving, in Matthew 18:21-22.          Then Peter came and said to Him, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” ²² Jesus *said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.

There are countless wrong ways for us to respond inappropriately to offense, leading to strife. There are primarily three  proper ways we can respond.  The first we have already looked at, it is to respond to offense with forgiveness. The second thing we can do is part of the context of today’s Proverb text. Proverbs 30:32 says: If you have been foolish in exalting yourself
Or if you have plotted evil, put your hand on your mouth. The psalmist says: Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; Keep watch over the door of my lips. ⁴ Do not incline my heart to any evil thing…(Psalm 141:3-4)  In truth though, it is not that we should say nothing, the hand and the guard over our mouth are to keep us from speaking without thinking, remembering:    “Death and life are in the power of the tongue” (Proverbs 18:21)  When we do speak it is important that we speak as it says in Ephesians 4:25.  

Therefore, laying aside falsehood, speak truth each one of you with his neighbor, for we are members of one another. It is best that we not speak to quickly, that we take the time to process and to forgive before we speak, but to say there is nothing wrong or to say nothing at all can also be dishonest, a falsehood. We need to as Paul says, lay aside falsehood, including holding on to what is wrong and speak the truth. Earlier in the Ephesians 4 passage verses 15-16,  Paul says:

 But speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ, ¹⁶ from whom the whole body, being fitted and held together by what every joint supplies, according to the proper working of each individual part, causes the growth of the body for the building up of itself in love.

In order to speak the truth in love, love must first be established in the relationship. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, helps us to understand what truth based in love is like.     Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, ⁵ does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, ⁶ does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; ⁷ bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

The ultimate measure of love is this: God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.(Romans 5:8) Christ died so that we could be reconciled and restored to God. Our love and the truth we speak should also be for the purpose of reconciliation and restoration, both to God and to each other.

Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus Christ; precious Holy Spirit forgive me if I have allowed anger to churn, causing strife. Show me, Holy Spirit, any bitterness, resentment or unforgiveness, any, enmities, jealousy, disputes, dissensions, factions that I have allowed in my life and relationships. I desire and choose to walk in forgiveness as You said Lord Jesus, unlimited forgiveness toward others. Help me to put my hand over my mouth and to guard my lips, controlling my tongue, knowing the power of life and death is in the words I speak. May I speak truth when I speak, truth in love. May my life be a testimony of Your love, a love that is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth;  bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.     Amen.